They Called Me “Unteachable”: My Math Tutor Quit on Me—and What I Learned

That moment—when the person hired to help gave up—became one of the clearest turning points in my learning. It sounds harsh, but it forced me to confront what really was holding me back: not my intelligence, but my mindset, habits, and the way I was taught.

Here’s how my “failure” story turned into a blueprint for anyone who feels irreparably bad at math (or anything else).

1. The Backstory: How I got labeled “unteachable”

In high school, I struggled with math. Concepts that seemed intuitive to others were black boxes to me. No matter how many hours I’d pore over textbooks, I’d hit walls. Finally, my parents hired a tutor. After a few sessions, the tutor delivered the verdict: I was “unteachable.” They refunded my money.

At first, I internalized it. I thought, maybe they’re right. If they can’t teach me, what hope do I have? But over time, that “”label”—“unteachable”—became a challenge, not a verdict.

I started asking:

• What does “unteachable” really mean?

• Is it possible that the fault isn’t with me but with how we’re teaching and learning?

• What would it take to disprove that label?

2. The myth of “bad at math”

Many people believe that math ability is innate—that you’re either a “math person” or you’re not. But research and real stories counter that. Math anxiety is real: it can cause panic, mental blocks, and negative self-talk, which in turn inhibit learning.

The reason “I’m bad at math” sticks is that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. You avoid challenges, you freeze under test pressure, and you stop trying alternative explanations. Meanwhile, your brain isn’t being trained to think flexibly.

One useful idea is to find the parts of math you don’t hate—geometry, puzzles, pattern recognition—and use that as a bridge.

3. What I changed—and how you can too

Here’s what I discovered by reverse engineering my own limitations.

A. Reframe the label

“Unteachable” wasn’t a permanent status; it was how someone felt about teaching me at that time. I redefined it: maybe I was hard to reach, not unteachable. That tiny shift opened the possibility of growth.

B. Start from the foundations

A lot of confusion in higher math comes from shaky basics. I revisited arithmetic, fractions, and algebraic manipulation—even things I thought I already “knew.” Tutors and learners on forums often speak about how strong foundational fluency makes advanced ideas click.

C. Embrace small, consistent wins

Rather than trying to “catch up fast,” I did bite-sized problems daily. Solving easier problems gives confidence. Over time, I increased difficulty. This combats math anxiety by breaking the barrier between dread and competence.

D. Seek varied explanations

If one tutor or method fails, it doesn’t mean you are the failure—it means that method didn’t connect with you. I looked for alternative explanations (video, visual, analogy, discussion). Sometimes the same topic, explained differently, unlocked everything.

E. Build a support system

Working alone is brutal when you feel stuck. I joined study groups and online forums and used peers or mentors. Explaining a concept to someone else often reveals your own gaps. On forums like r/learnmath, many learners emphasize how social math study helps.

F. Normalize mistakes (and “productive stupidity”)

Math is messy. Even top mathematicians speak of “facing your own stupidity”—wrestling with ideas you can’t immediately grasp. Math For Love Mistakes are not proof of incompetence; they’re part of thinking. The more you make them, the more you learn how your brain approaches (and misapproaches) a problem.

4. From “unteachable” to possibility

It wasn’t overnight. But gradually:

• I started to feel less frozen when facing a math problem.

• I realized I could predict where I would go wrong and stop before I spiraled.

• I gained the confidence to ask, “Why does this work?” instead of memorizing.

• I discovered math could feel like a puzzle, not a trap.

Eventually, I took courses that once terrified me. I even helped peers in topics I once couldn’t understand.

5. What your “math quitting tutor” moment might mean (and how to turn it around)

If you’ve ever had a moment when someone gave up on teaching you—a teacher, tutor, peer, or even your own assumptions—here’s what to remember:

• That moment is a signal, not a verdict. It shows a breakdown in the teaching–learning connection, not your potential.

• Growth needs iteration. Try new methods, revisit basics, and shift pace.

• Self-talk matters. Replace “I’m hopeless” with “I don’t get this yet.”

• Support is not cheating. Use community, peers, and mentors.

• Celebrate the cracks. Fractures in understanding are where breakthroughs live.

6. SEO & discoverability—keywords, format, and next steps

If you publish this online, consider sprinkling and repeating (naturally) phrases like

• “bad at math”

• “math anxiety”

• “overcoming math fear”

• “learning math after struggling”

• “math mindset transformation”

Also use subheadings, bullet lists, and short paragraphs to aid readability. If possible, include a personal anecdote or image (your handwritten notes, a problem you once couldn’t solve) to ground the story.

You might also link out to resources:

• Guides on math anxiety: weber.edu + 2blog.acceleratelearning.com + 2

• Communities like r/learnmath or math-help forums

• Essays on rewriting negative math mindsets

7. Final thought: don’t let a single moment define your capacity

The tutor who refunded your parents today is an anecdote. What matters is your next 100 small steps. If you keep chipping away—building basics, mixing methods, seeking support—you can reshape your relationship with math (or with any learning you thought was closed to you).

If you’re looking for tools to support your math reboot, here are two reading resources that helped me reshape my thinking and bridge gaps in understanding:

• One is a straightforward, well-organized companion that revisits fundamental topics in a clear, visual way, making it easier to pick up where you left off. → Check it out here

• The other offers a big-picture view of mathematical ideas, helping you see how concepts connect across domains, which is especially useful when your confidence feels piecemeal or fractured. → Take a look here

These aren’t miracle cures—but in moments when you feel stuck, they give you new angles and renewed momentum.

To complement your learning journey, I also created a hands-on resource that applies the same “small, consistent wins” philosophy to real-world writing and marketing: The Ultimate Email ROI Playbook: Write Short, Profitable Emails That Sell While You Sleep. This printable guide breaks down how to craft emails that get opened, read, and acted upon—even when your audience is busy (or skeptical). Whether you’re an entrepreneur, freelancer, or someone trying to master the art of persuasive writing, this playbook gives you actionable templates, techniques, and daily micro-practices. You can grab it right here: Download the playbook and start writing emails that work while you rest.